Eurovision 2017: The Aftermath

It's been a few months since the final of the Eurovision Song Contest, and I haven't wanted to write about it because as a resident of the United States, the clips have been geoblocked, so I'm not able to post anything here on this blog that are viewable to me.

I have a couple things I really want to share.

1.  The best song in the contest won for the second year in a row.

Salvador Sobral   "Amor Pelos Dois"  (Portuguese national final)

The song was a three minute bit of stillness in the middle of painfully current pop and shouty ballads.   If you can go out and find the final performance online, it's well worth it.

2.   The European Broadcasting Union has proven to be an ineffectual European bureaucracy.

I have two reasons for this.   The first is their handling of the Russian/Ukrainian conflict.   Their inability to see the obvious propaganda war the two countries would have and deal and their tone deaf response to it just proves how ineffectual and out of touch the organization is.

The other thing that is that the organization has not addressed the geoblocking in North America.  I'm certain the reason is due to a rights deal with Viacom, the company that owns the television channel that broadcasts Eurovision in the US.  Yet the EBU has said nothing and questions about the issue are not answered by representatives of the EBU.   It is another example of the lack of transparency in multinational European organizations that is expected yet frustrating.

3.  Ukraine put on a pretty decent show.

There was a lot of drama over the production of this year's contest, but when all was said and done, Ukraine did a decent job.   Other than a Ukrainian idiot who stage crashed the performance of last years winner, everything went off without a hitch.

I also found a group that I started to listen to after the contest.

ONUKA & The National Academic Orchestra of Folk Instruments of Ukraine   "Megamix"

ONUKA's performance is a medley of a number of their songs and is well worth going and listening to more of their stuff.

That's about it for this year.   I am looking forward to next year's contest in Portugal and if all things go to plan, I'll be able to vote in next year's contest. 

Eurovision 2017: Second Semifinal (predictions)

Eight out of ten isn't bad for predictions of the first semifinal.   Australia and Cyprus beat out Finland and Latvia.  

Sure Qualifiers

• Bulgaria
• Estonia
• Israel
• Romania

The Songs Without A Chance

• Ireland
• Lithuania
• Macedonia
• Malta
• Switzerland

The Undefined Middle

• Austria
• Belarus
• Croatia
• Denmark
• Hungary
• Norway
• San Marino
• Serbia
• The Netherlands

So that said, here are my guesses for qualification

• Austria
• Belarus
• Bulgaria
• Croatia
• Denmark
• Estonia
• Israel
• Norway
• Romania
• The Netherlands

And if you are reading this in a European country, please spare a vote for this entry:

Naviband   "Story of My Life"

Eurovision 2017: Semifinal One (who will qualify)

Now it's the post where I try to guess the thoughts of people all over Europe and fail miserably!   What fun.

The Sure Qualifiers

• Armenia
• Finland
• Latvia
• Portugal
• Sweden

The Songs Without A Chance

• Albania
• Czech Republic
• Slovenia

The Undefined Middle

• Australia
• Azerbaijan
• Belgium
• Cyprus
• Georgia
• Greece
• Iceland
• Moldova
• Montenegro
• Poland

So my guesses are:

• Armenia
• Azerbaijan
• Belgium
• Finland
• Greece
• Latvia
• Moldova
• Poland
• Portugal
• Sweden

It's quite different than the songs I personally like the best.

1.  Portugal

2.  Finland

3.  Georgia

4.  Armenia

5.  Azerbaijan

6.  Czech Republic

7.  Montenegro

8.  Moldova

9.  Belgium

10.  Albania

So please, if you are reading this, please drop a vote for the Portuguese entry for this American's sake. 

Salvador Sobral   "Amar Pelos Dois"  (live from Spain Calling)

Eurovision 2017: United Kingdom

Hooray!   The last song!    

I am going to say that the United Kingdom have gotten most everything right this year.

Lucie Jones   "Never Give Up On You"

They have perhaps the best singer in this year's contest who is able to perform a technically difficult song impeccably.   The lyrics are terrible but Jones is able to elevate them to a point where they aren't a distraction.

If the staging is right (a difficult task for the BBC's Eurovision team), this could outperform the songs the UK has sent in the past ten years.

I'm shocked to say it's in my top ten.   I don't think I've put one in my top ten since I seriously started watching Eurovision.

Eurovision 2017: Spain

Do it for your lover/

Do it for your lover/

Baby, clap your hands/

and do it for your lover

Daniel Navarro    "Do It For Your Lover"

I get he's going for a frothy, relaxed, beachy summer song.    The chorus can only be described one way.

Ew.

I also get they're going for a frothy, relaxed, beachy summer look.   The look can only be described one way.

Ew.

Dude, button up your shirt a button or two.  You aren't that attractive.

This is just tragically terrible and the worst song that has been sent to the contest this year.

Eurovision 2017: Italy

The song most likely going to win the contest this year is the Italian entry.

Francesco Gabbani   "Occidentali's Karma"

It's upbeat, idiosyncratic, silly, and has a gimmick that will be in Eurovision clips from here on out.

Yet it's a silly song with a statement.   It's about Western cultural appropriation of Eastern mysticism.   Whether the song is commenting on or indulging in the cultural appropriation is up to interpretation.  It has, however, garnered a lot of press and helped the print sales of the book "The Naked Ape" by English zoologist Desmond Morris.

I will say this song is not my favorite.   That distinction still belongs to Portugal.   But this would be a worthy winner.

Eurovision 2017: Germany

Germany has had one of the worst Eurovision track records in the past few years.  They have sent songs that have moldered at the bottom of the results table.  (Even one that was one of my personal favorites.)

I don't think Germany is going to change this trend with this year's song.

Levina  "Perfect Life"

This is a perfectly nice song--very credible and very radio friendly.   The problem is the song, like the French song before it, is not particularly memorable.   Unless the stage show is spectacular, there is nothing for a viewer to remember to willingly vote it for and her voice is not unique enough for the juries to rank highly enough to get points.

Poor Levina.

Eurovision 2017: Ukraine

There is a fine line that a host country has to tread when they host the Eurovision Song Contest..  Because of the financial burden on the host broadcaster, winning the contest twice isn't the smartest thing to do.  However you also have to send a song that is credible.

Ukraine has walked that tightrope quite well with their entry.

O.Torvald   "Time"

"Time" is a nice piece of pop rock that sounds like it is from the early 2000s.    It's a perfectly nice example of the genre, but it's not anything that is likely going to win the contest.  

It's the perfect host country entry.

Eurovision 2017: France

I don't know what is missing from the French entry this year. 

Alma   "Requiem"

The blend of chanson and North African sounds should be appealing but I find it completely forgettable.  I think it comes down to Alma.  She's a cypher of a singer, and although the tune is catchy, she has no charisma whatsoever.

This isn't going to trouble for the win.   It may even fall in the bottom five songs.

Eurovision 2017: Israel

Third time's a charm for Imri Ziv.   He was a backing singer for the last two Israeli entrants, and he won a singing competition to represent Israel at Eurovision.

Imri    "I Feel Alive"

It's a generic summer party song.   It closes out the second semifinal.   He's good looking.   It's qualifying for the final.   Given a good placement there, it could be a top 10 song.

Will anybody listen to this song when Eurovision is over?   Not likely.   Is it a good Eurovision song?  Yep.  It's fun.

Eurovision 2017: Estonia

The dramatic duet is a staple of Eurovision and Estonia has provided this year's example.

Koit Toome and Laura   "Verona"

Cheese.   Pure unadulterated musical cheese.  The singing is overly dramatic, the lyrics are soppy, and the stage chemistry is lackluster.

This is likely going to have a top 10 finish.  It's a "traditional" Eurovision song, and the campness of the song combined with the professional gleam of the production makes this very easy for both juries and viewers at home to vote for it.

I'll be skipping over it when it comes up on my iPod.

Eurovision 2017: Lithuania

There has to be an audience out there for the Lithuanian entry this year.

Fusedmarc   "Rain of Revolution"

"Rain of Revolution" is the least accessible song at this year's contest.  There's no immediate hook to connect you to the song.  That's why this is not likely to qualify.

I like the fact that it's different, even if I don't particularly like it.   "Rain of Revolution" isn't going to make the final, though.

Eurovision 2017: Bulgaria

The Bulgarian song is one of the favorites at this year's contest, and the fan universe has been full of love for this song.

Kristian Kostov   "Beautiful Mess"

Bulgaria really seems to be hungry for a win, and this song in a template to put on a big stage show. The Bulgarian broadcaster also has a track record--Poli Genova get to fourth place last year.   The odds makers also think this is going to do well, it's third in the odds to win. It also doesn't hurt that the Bulgarian broadcaster really wants to win the contest.

I find the song perfectly forgettable in the way the Swedish entry is forgettable.  This is meant to appeal to the widest audience possible and to do that, you lose anything that would make it truly connect with anybody.  It has been constructed to be a Eurovision hit and I am not a fan of constructed pop.    Kostov is a preternaturally talented singer, but this is ultimately forgettable.

Eurovision 2017: Belarus

It's always great when a country surprises with their entry, and this year Belarus has done just that.

Naviband    "Historyja majho žyccia"

Belarus usually chooses a song that apes western musical sensibilities and usually comes out the worse for wear.   This year, they chose a song that has strong ties to the folk music of the region and is sung in the Belarussian language.   I love it.   It's been in my Eurovision song rotation since I first heard it, much to the chagrin of my husband.

Qualification to the final is a much trickier thing.  I hope this will appeal to enough viewers and jury members to get it through to the final on Saturday.  Belarus doesn't have a great qualification track record, but I hope the quality will win out.

Eurovision 2017: Switzerland

Switzerland has sent another Eurovision-by-the-numbers song.

Timebelle    "Apollo"

She's flat.  The song is forgettable.   It shouldn't qualify.

Nothing more to say,   It's not worth my time.

Eurovision 2017: Norway

Like Croatia, the Norwegian entry is going to have a problem with staging.

JOWST   "Grab The Moment"

JOWST isn't the singer, Aleksander Walmann is the singer.  JOWST is the producer--the man in the Daft Punk knockoff mask.   He's come up with song that could be played in the background of an upscale clothing store like Uniqlo.  "Grab The Moment" a song that sounds familiar, sounds like it was cutting edge a couple years ago, and obscure enough to have the cachet of cool.  

I'm just interested to see how this song is going to be performed in Kyiv.   There's a lot of mechanically recorded voices.   That's one of the few verboten things at Eurovision.  Vocals must be performed live.   The chorus is Waldmann's voice put through electronic processing and if this is allowed, there could be a precedent setter.

I don't see the song being an obvious qualifier.   Although there's some producing wizadry at work in the song, the staging is deathly static.   There's nothing to catch the eye and during the national final performance, I was critiquing Waldmann's hat and shirt combo, which is not a good sign.

Eurovision 2017: Denmark

Denmark seems to love sending save, middle-of-the-road songs to Eurovision.   On occasion, these choices allow them to win the whole contest.  In recent years, they haven't been able to send the song to the final.

They're hoping to change that with this ballad.

Anja   "Where I Am"

This is one of those songs that is more about the artist doing a lot of vocalizing than actually interpreting the lyrics of the songs.  It's rather reminiscent of last year's Australian entry.   The difference is that the Danish song is much lyrically weaker that the Australian entry from last year.   You can remember the words of "Sound of Silence", but "Where I Am" is the song where the girl sings about "putting down my armor".

Anja is vocally strong and the chorus will be memorable enough in the recap to likely allow the song to qualify.   I can't see this challenging for the win.  

Eurovision 2017: Croatia

Jacques Houdek is an interesting character.   He's a well known Croatian singer and music producer who has been known to support right leaning political parties in his country and making statements that could be perceived as anti-gay.

However, the pull of international exposure has made him willing to backtrack his statements and represent Croatia this year.  (Not that he hasn't tried before--he's wanted to represent Croatia since 2003 and was finally internally selected by the Croatian national broadcaster.)

Jacques Houdek   "My Friend"

This is much less a song than a piece of performance art--Houdek performs both the operatic Italian and poppy English lyrics in the song and he intends to perform both in Kyiv.

If he is able to pull this off, I suspect that it will do quite well.  However, if the tone is off, this will go down as a memorable fiasco.  It will be recapped in Eurovision retrospectives in the "crazy Eurovision entries" section either way, so whether it does well or flops, it's a win for the singer.

Eurovision 2017: San Marino

Welcome back to Valentina Monetta, San Marino's chanteuse.

This is her fourth time representing San Marino and this is the first time she's in a duet with American singer Jimmie Wilson.

Valentina Monetta and Jimmie Wilson   "Spirit of the Night"

This song is not good.  It's cheap, disposable, and really doesn't have a chance to win the contest.

But I'm personally ranking this song higher that a lot of the other songs in the contest.

This song is fun.  Watching their performance live performance makes me look forward to seeing what they do in Kyiv.   There's a chemistry between Monetta and Wilson that's noticeable on stage.  That chemistry is what makes me thing this could possibly be a surprise qualifier for the final.

I can't wait to see this song performed live.

Eurovision 2017: Ireland

Louis Walsh and Linda Martin need to step away from having any involvement in the Irish entry in the Eurovision Song Contest.

Both Walsh and Martin and seem to live in the 1990s, when the Celtic Tiger was beginning to roar, and Ireland could do no wrong at Eurovision.   Ireland's entry "Dying to Try" feels like it could fit in to songs from that period.

Brendan Murray   "Dying to Try"

I think Ireland is trying for classic, but instead "Dying to Try" comes across as dated.   

I also find the singer total mismatched to the words of the song.   Murray is a young man who looks a number of years younger than the 20 years his biography says he is.   It's kind of hard to buy a love song from a young man who looks like he's just graduated junior high and has barely passed puberty, much less been able to sing lyrics like this:

I'll keep you safe in my arms/
Build a bridge to your heart every day

The song's not going anywhere, much less the finals of this year's song contest.

Eurovision 2017: Hungary

I was in New York City when this song was chosen as the Hungarian entry for Eurovision.   I had it playing when I was taking a shower and was confused by what I was hearing.     So when I finished getting ready, I sat down and gave full attention to the performance, figuring that I had missed something that was drowned out by the running water.  I was still confused by what I was hearing.

Quite frankly, I still don't understand the Hungarian entry.

Joci Pápai   "Origo"

I admire the fact that this song is uncompromising.   While a lot of songs in this semifinal feel like mimeographs of songs playing on the radio, "Origo" is a fusion of Romani music and rap.   Because it is so different, it will remain in people's minds and will make it to the final.    

It is not my taste, but not everything is.

Eurovision 2017: The Netherlands

I have to admit that I am reserving my judgement on the Dutch entry until I actually see the live performance.

OG3NE has a Eurovision pedigree--having represented the Netherlands back in 2007 at Junior Eurovision and they've become one of the most successful musical acts in The Netherlands.   So, it's not surprising that they would represent their country at Eurovision.

O'G3NE   "Lights and Shadows"

Yes, it does feel like Winston Phillips has been reformed.   But the harmonies.   The harmonies are so infectious that you want to listen to them sing the phone book.

I suspect that this will come alive when performed live--even if the song is extremely dated.   Until then, I have no real way to judge the song.

Eurovision 2017: Romania

God bless you, Romania.   You have sent the crazy song to Eurovision.

Ilinca ft. Alex Florea   "Yodel It!"

Romanian rapping and yodeling.   It's not good.  You can't understand what they say.   They look kind of stupid.  Yeah, I kind of love it too.

There's not doubt that this is qualifying--it fills the "let's vote for the crappy song" quota that a lot of people crave when watching Eurovision.    This will do a lot better than it should, but that's what makes Eurovision great.

Eurovision 2017: Malta

Wow, the first part of semifinal two of this year's semifinal is a dog's breakfast of songs. Malta's entry is another one of those songs.

Claudia Faniello   "Breathlessly"

Faniello has been trying to represent Malta at Eurovision since 2006, and after eleven years of trying she's flying the flag for Malta.   

She's representing them with a dated power ballad that she will wind up oversinging and not make it to the final.   There is nothing that screams "vote for me" with Malta's entry this year.   It's a non-qualifier for sure.

Eurovision 2017: Macedonia

The first few songs in the second semifinal this year have been made up of songs that really haven't made an impact.

Macedonia's song is another one of those forgettable songs.

Jana Burčeska   "Dance Alone"

However, unlike the previous two songs, Macedonia's song actually has a chance to make an impact on stage.  "Dance Alone" begs for flashy lights and sexy dancers.

If the team behind the Macedonian entry can come up with a visually interesting staging and Burčeska can stomp the stage properly, there is a chance that this could make it to the finals.

However, qualification isn't guaranteed.  Macedonia doesn't have many friendly votes from other countries and this has to overcome the apathy from other countries to make the final.  Everything has to be perfect in the semifinal for Macedonia to qualify, and I look forward to seeing how the chips fall with this song.

Eurovision 2017: Serbia

I am going to damn the Serbian entry with faint praise.

Tijana Bogićević   "In Too Deep"

There's a part of the song that sounds like Katy Perry's song "Firework".   Other than that, the song is forgettable.

Despite that, "In Too Deep" is likely to qualify for the finals.  That comes down to shared musical tastes that Serbia has with a number of neighbors that are in this semifinal.  Macedonia and Croatia are part of the shared musical community of the former Yugoslavia and Austria has a large ex-Yugoslav emigrant community.    So, this song will likely make the final while other, more interesting songs will not qualify.

it's one of the things that makes me really enjoy Eurovision.   It's not always just about the quality of the songs, but also about the cultural connections that countries have with each other.

Eurovision 2017: Austria

Austria's entry is rather nice.

Nathan Trent   "Running On Air"

The Jack Johnson sound that Trent is performing is pretty nice.    Very radio friendly.

The problem is that this song is pretty nice and very radio friendly.   There isn't anything that makes me think the song will translate well on the stage in Kyiv and that's a nail in the coffin for Austria's chances in making the final.

Austria doesn't have any musical allies at Eurovision, so to make it to Saturday night there has to be something special about the performance.   Three minutes of perfectly pleasant pop isn't going to make people pick up the phone.

Eurovision 2017: Latvia

Finally, I'm at the end of the First Semifinal and Latvia will be closing out the song contest.  They've been having a renaissance at Eurovision over the past few years, and Triana Park are hoping to help their country qualify for the third straight year.

Triana Park   "Line"

God bless them.   They have been trying to represent Latvia in Eurovision since 2008 and they made it on their sixth attempt.

With the placement at the end of the semifinal and their unique sound will allow this to sail into the final,  That's great for a country that couldn't qualify for years--consistently being at the bottom of their given semifinal.

Even though this is going to easily qualify, I hate the song.   My dislike of the song comes down to the lead singer.  There should be an energy brought to the song and a charismatic lead vocalist can do that.  Agnese Rakovska doesn't seem to have that charisma.   Throughout her entire performance, Rakovska is disconnected from the audience.   When you combine that weakness with the slight, pitchy vocals in the performance, it makes me not warm to the song.

 

Eurovision 2017: Armenia

I know it's a terrible thing to say, but Armenia has taken the place of Turkey in this year's Eurovision Song Contest by sending Artsvik and her song "Fly With Me".

Artsvik   "Fly With Me"

You can trace this ethnic sound back to Sertab Erener and her winning song in 2003.   This eastern sound was omnipresent at Eurovision for a number of years in the mid-2000s.   After 10 years, this comes acrossas different and rather appealing.

Because this type of song has been out of style for so long, "Fly With Me" catches your ear and stands out from all the other songs in the contest.   The staging will be visually interesting and this should make it to the final.

Eurovision 2017: Slovenia

I have not been waiting to type these words.   Slovenia is a country I root for in the Eurovision Song Contest, but I have to say the following:

Slovenia has sent the worst song in this year's Eurovision Song Contest.

Omar Naber   "On My Way"

This style of song is completely out of style and Naber's earnestness makes the song seem even more dated.   Had this been performed in the early 1990s, this song would have been a top five placement.  This isn't the early 1990s and it's just dreary.

Eurovision 2017: Czech Republic

I always root for the underdog and the Czech Republic is the biggest Eurovision underdog.   They have only made the finals once and have had the cruel distinction of receiving "nul points' in a semifinal.

I want the Czech Republic to succeed and I want them to succeed spectacularly.

I don't think the Czech Republic will do so this year.

Martina Bárta  "My Turn"

I hate to dismiss this as a filler song, but it is.   This smoky jazzy ballad is going to be swallowed up on the stage in Kyiv and the Czech Republic doesn't have any friends who vote for it.  This is one of the few songs this year that I can say for certain has no chance of qualifying for the final.  

That said, this song is one that I personally love and "My Turn" has made me listen to more of her music.   She has been in jazz bands, plays the French horn, and just comes off as being cool.   She may not have voting success in Kyiv, but I would spend the money to see her in concert or buy one of her CDs.

Eurovision 2017: Iceland

Could a song be too cool to succeed at the Eurovision Song Contest?

Svala   "Paper"

Svala is a musical name in Iceland.  She has been active in the Icelandic music industry since the mid-80s and   She is currently a judge on the Icelandic verison of "The Voice" and she splits her time between Iceland and Los Angeles.

Svala brings that cross-continent vibe to Eurovision and I suspect the 80s style lighting and art pop fashions are choices that are not going to translate well to the viewing public.   I like the personal style she brings but I suspect they are going to be too niche to appeal to the wider audience.  This is not going to qualify when lesser quality songs will succeed.

Eurovision 2017: Moldova

I love it when Moldova sends a quirky song to the Eurovision Song Contest.   In a period where Eurovision is considered  is tending towards serious songs,, a goofy number from an obscure country is very nice.

Moldova has delivered this yet again with light, sax heavy Europop number.

SunStroke Project  "Hey, Mamma!"

I suspect that this will make the final because it is sug a silly upbeat number--you need to have a traditional "Eurovision" song.   This fits the bill.

Do I like this song?   Not really.   It's extrememly disposable and going to be great filler between other, better songs in the final

Eurovision 2017: Poland

English has become the lingua franca in the Eurovision Song Contest--there are only four songs sung completely in a language other than English.   That means we have a lot of non-native speakers in the contest, and this fact is demonstrated by the Polish entry this year.

Kasia Moś   "Flashlight"

Moś has gone to music school and has worked in the United States, yet this performance makes me think her grasp of English isn't particularly strong.   Much of the song is indecipherable to me, a native English speaker.  Moś also emphasizes the meter of musical phrases over the actual lyric in this song that underlines this point.   The full effect of her performance strikes me as a singer who does not know English.

Moś does have an interesting voice and an compelling stage presence and  think I would have liked this much more had this been performed in Polish because she could bring an understanding of a language that she does not have in English.

There is not doubt that Poland will make the final--the Polish diaspora throughout Europe will vote it through.  

Eurovision 2017: Cyprus

God bless Cyprus.   They ran a national final in 2015 and they have been working their way through the finalzts one by one.  I will say that Cyprus is being extremely cost effective when choosing Eurovision entries.   Watch out for Doody next year.

Hovig came in fourth place in the 2015 Cypriot national final with the song "Stone In A River" and he is a singer of bog standard male pop music.

Hovig   "Gravity"

Because they are in the same genre, it's rather obvious to make direct comparisons to the Swedish entry this year.  In all regards, Hovig winds up looking like the worst entry.    No matter how much I personally dislike the Swedish entry, it is polished and professional.   Compared to Robin Bengtsson, Hovig looks likes he is singing at talent night at a local high school.

Cyprus is lucky that Greece is in the same semifinal, which gives it a chance to qualify for the final.   Otherwise I would say this is a sure non-qualifier.    It is a completely forgettable song with a singer who can't lift it out the mediocrity.  

Eurovision 2017: Greece

Compared to the Portuguese entry that precedes it in the First Semifinal, Greece's entry is manufactured and synthesized within an inch of its life.

Demy   "This Is Love"

Demy has a successful career in Greece, with two albums and a lot of Greek music awards.  So, I suppose that she can sing. 

But boy, this song stinks to high heaven.  The structure is terrible, the instrumentation is cheap sounding, and the lyrics are clichéd.

The only reason that the song will make it to the final is diaspora voting.   It certainly won't be for musical quality.

Eurovision 2017: Portugal

I am going to type words that I have been dying to type since I started following the Eurovision Song Contest back in the 1990s.

Portugal has sent the best song to Eurovision this year.

Yes, seriously.   Portugal has sent the best song to the Eurovision this year.

Salvador Sobral  "Amar Pelos Dois"

Yeah, it sounds old fashioned

Yeah, he's got a weird stage presence.

Yeah it's in Portuguese.

Yet "Amor Pelos Dois" has done something that no other song has done this year--it made me stop what I was doing and actively listen to the song.   Sobral's performance of a simple love song is extremely effective and is one of honest emotion instead of manufactured spectacle.  

If the team in charge of staging this song is able to recreate the magic in the national final performance, Portugal could have the best placing they have ever had in any Eurovision Song Contest.

Wouldn't that be awesome?

Eurovision 2017: Azerbaijan

I am really snide when it comes to Azerbaijan's Eurovision songs, because they have used the Eurovision Song Contest as a tool of soft power.to promote themselves as a world power.

That stench of desperation has tainted my opinion of their entries--which boils down to "money can't buy you taste".   But this year, I have to set my cynicism aside.   I genuinely like the song that Azerbaijan is sending to Kyiv.

Dihaj   "Skeletons"

It is another one of those modern, radio-friendly numbers that sound like songs that are on the radio right now.   Because it sounds like something you already like, it's a no-brainer that people will vote for this.  And the Azerbaijani broadcaster will throw a little money at the staging to make this be something you won't forget.

So yeah, you'll see this in the final and for once I won't mind.

Eurovision 2017: Finland

Finland hasn't been one of the most successful Eurovision countries in the past few years, so listening to this year's entry was a surprise.

Norma John   "Blackbird"

The dark, moody song by the duo Norma John isn't like any other song in the contest.   Instead of tending towards the pop sensibilities of today, the son brings to mind the music of Eva Cassidy--not a name you necessarily associate with the Eurovision Song Contest.

Sadly, this song in another song that could easily not qualify, since there are more Eurovision fan friendly songs in the contest and that makes me sad, since it's one of my three favorite songs in the contest and I'd willingly spend a bit of money to vote for it.

Eurovision 2017: Montenegro

I love the Montenegrin Eurovision entries.   Montenegro is a country that has always been experimental when it comes to Eurovision and this year is no exception.

Slavko Kalezić   "Space"

We have a track that might have been played at the local gay bar back in 2009!

Kalezić's attempts to be sexy while singing this single entendre in music form is absolutely hilarious and I look forward to the "spectacle" that will be his live performance.  We haven't had a song that has pandered to the gay audience in this way in ages.

I don't think it will make it out of the semifinal, but it will be a fun three minutes.

Eurovision 2017: Belgium

When the Belgian broadcaster released "City Lights", the fan community went crazy.  I can understand the excitement. The song sounds modern and the video exudes cool.

Blanche   "City Lights"

However, I thought there was something off with the song, which I didn't understand until I heard it live.

Blanche  "City Lights (Live from London Eurovision Party 2017)*

Blanche was shoehorned into a song that is not suited for her and the live performance shows that.  The backing  track overwhelms her and her performing style deadens the energy of the song. 

 

RTBF, the Franco-Belgian broadcaster wanted a follow up to the big success of their entry two years ago--Loïc Nottet.

Loïc Nottet  "Rhythm Inside"   2015

It's understandable that the broadcaster went back to the same blueprint for this year's contest and chose "City Lights" as the song they wanted to send.

Now, take a listen to Blanche's audition song to The Voice Belgique, the singing program where Blanche got her start as a professional singer.  

Ellie Delvaux (a.k.a. Blanche)   "Daydreamer"

  

I'm sure the broadcaster was hoping for a singer that would give a cool vibe to the song--like Astrud Gilberto or Nico.     It doesn't work.   Blanche comes across as scared, not coolly confident.

I'm certain the broadcaster has plans for Blanche that will address this with the staging in Kyiv, but I can see Belgium being the shock non-qualifier from Semifinal One.

Eurovision 2017: Albania

Albania seems to be in a rut.   For the past four years, they have sent a woman with a huge voice singing a string heavy power ballad.

Albania has not had a good track record qualifying in recent years with women with huge voices singing power ballads and in a year where there are a lot of women with huge voices singing power ballads, this year's Albanian entrant has to find something to make herself memorable.

Lindita   "Bote"

Lindita   "World"

As you can see in both the original Albanian entry and the English revamp, Lindita has chosen to feature her ass.

Her ass is lovely, but when I'm more interested in her ass than her song, there's a problem.

He sex appeal is the way she'll make it into the Eurovision final, but I want Albania to stop sending this type of song to Eurovision.  Send another ethnic-influenced hair band!   Send a disco diva!   Stop the melodramatic ballads!

Eurovision 2017: Australia

This is Australia's third year in the Eurovision Song Contest and I think they're here to stay.  

Like Australia's other two entrants, Firebrace was selected internally by the Australian broadcaster SBS to represent them in Kyiv.   Like the other two entries, Firebrace has also one a major televised singing completion, in his case the 2016 edition of X Factor Australia.

Isaiah Firebrace   "Don't Come Easy"

There's no denying that Firebrace has a good voice (although he has a nasty case of  unnecessary melisma for no reason that comes from performing in singing competitions).     The song is structured to showcase his soulful voice.   In other words, the framework has been built to create a very competitive Eurovision performance.

I am looking forward to seeing how this is staged and the song should qualify for the final.

Eurovision 2017: Georgia

There's something really hard about being the first country to declare your song in Eurovision--it will be compared to every other Eurovision song.

Tamara Gachechiladze   "Keep The Faith"

Comparisons are very easy for this song.   You take the Bond theme theatrics of Conchita Wurst's winning song from 2014 and combine it with the political message of Jamala's winning entry of last year and you get "Keep The Faith". 

The song has courted controversy due to the staging of the national final performance--especially at 1:27, when a graphic of a newspaper stating "Russia Invades Geo..." is prominently features on the screen behind her.

It's not the first time Gachechiladze has been a part of this sort of musical brinksmanship before.   She was a part of the Georgian entry in 2009 that was disqualified because it had lyrics that were considered to be political speech.

3G and Stephane   "I Don't Wanna Put In"

I suspect that the political staging of the national final will be swapped out for something more Eurovision friendly, but I think this is a song on the bubble for qualification.   There are a lot of power ballads sung by attractive women and this is very early in the semifinal and is likely to be forgotten.  

It's a shame.  I kind of like it.

Eurovision 2017: Sweden

Another year, another Eurovision Song Contest.

First up is the Eurovision powerhouse nation of Sweden

Sweden is the master of modern Eurovision, and this year's entry is another example of why the country has that reputation.  "I Can't Go On" is a piece of pop that sounds like it should be on a Top 40 station with a performance has been polished to a sheen.   Take a look at the video below to see what I mean.

Robin Bengtsson   "I Can't Go On

Everything about the song is meant to have immediate impact, which is going to pull in casual voters when they see it in the final.   There's no doubt that Sweden will make the final.

However, I think this song is one of the worst entries this year.   If you take away the bells and whistles of the staging, the song is really terrible--it comes across as a knockoff of a Maroon 5 or Justin Timberlake song.

In other words I've heard this song before.

This could be forgiven if Bengtsson had personal charisma.   However, watching this performance, Bengtsson comes off as stiff and mechanical.   To make this work, Bengtsson needs to charm my pants off.   Instead, he's coming across as all swagger and no sex appeal.   It's more funny than sexy.

I'm sure this is a top five song.   I just don't have to like it.