I am really snide when it comes to Azerbaijan's Eurovision songs, because they have used the Eurovision Song Contest as a tool of soft power.to promote themselves as a world power.
That stench of desperation has tainted my opinion of their entries--which boils down to "money can't buy you taste". But this year, I have to set my cynicism aside. I genuinely like the song that Azerbaijan is sending to Kyiv.
Dihaj "Skeletons"
It is another one of those modern, radio-friendly numbers that sound like songs that are on the radio right now. Because it sounds like something you already like, it's a no-brainer that people will vote for this. And the Azerbaijani broadcaster will throw a little money at the staging to make this be something you won't forget.
So yeah, you'll see this in the final and for once I won't mind.
And here are the ten songs who made it through to the final on Saturday
Armenia
Austria
Azerbaijan
Croatia
Czech Republic
Cyprus
Hungary
Malta
the Netherlands
Russia
Seven out of ten isn't particularly bad, and after watching the final,
I can't really say that I disagree. After watching the show, nine out of ten of these are ones that were obvious finalists.
The Biggest Surprise
Nina Kraljić "Lighthouse" Croatia
I had thought an early place in the running order combined with an over-the-top costume would prevent Croatia from qualifying. The Croatian broadcaster hasn't always been the best at staging songs, so I'm glad to see this overcame the visual deficiency.
The Biggest Disappointment
Samra "Miracle" Azerbaijan
In my opinion, "Miracle" was the song that didn't deserve to qualify in the top ten. The staging was tacky and the vocals were weak. And the gold plated American football uniform? Don't get me started.
The Song I Would Have Voted For
Highway "The Real Thing" Montenegro
Although the Czech Republic would have gotten my first vote, Montenegro came in a close second. While the somewhat experimental hard rock was something that would have never qualified, I really responded to the music and staging. In a semifinal of things that were polished to an inch of their life, "The Real Thing" was interesting because it was deliberately unpolished.
The Can't Miss Song
Serhat "I Didn't Know" San Marino
I could have gone with the Armenian or Russian entries here, but really you'll see them elsewhere. San Marino's utter weirdness deserves to be highlighted here. It's trying so hard to be kitschy camp and it fails. It's worth a watch.
It's really difficult for me to sit and write about the Azerbaijani entry because of my own personal bias against the country. The naked ambition the Azerbaijani broadcaster İctimai Television has shown since their debut in 2008 is offputting.
Expect a fire motif from Azerbaijan
Because of their tactical choices (and being from a former Soviet state with a common musical tradition as a number of other Eurovision participating countries) Azerbaijan has been the most successful country at Eurovision, having never failed to make the final since their debut.
Azerbaijan isn't going to fail this year either:
Elnur Hüseynov "Hour of the Wolf"
In a year of ballads (and there are a lot of them), this is one of the strongest entries. Like most years, the Azerbaijani song has been written by a truckload of Swedes (who are know for penning many successful Eurovision songs.) The song is dramatic and generic, which means it's going to do well.
It also doesn't hurt that Hüseynov has done Eurovision before, back in 2008
Elnur and Samir "Day After Day" 2008
Insane and kind of fun, right?
As for my opinion on the "Hour of the Wolf", I'm lukewarm. Although the song is well written and the performance is solid, there's nothing extraordinary about the song that makes me love it. There are no risks taken in "Hour of the Wolf" and it shows.
That said, if Azerbaijan gets the staging right (and trust they will) and Hüseynov doesn't oversing the song (which is more than likely), expect another top 10 result for Azerbaijan.
Poland has done a u-turn this year with their entry for Eurovision this year.
Traditional Polish Easter Eggs
Instead of the rather edgy folk/hip hop hybrid of last year's entry, Poland has gone with a "traditional" Eurovision style--the emotive ballad.
Monika Kuszyńska "In The Name Of Love"
It's an empowering song about love with piano and strings that builds slowly to a powerful ending. Nothing particularly original and unlikely to set the scoreboard aflame during the final.
Yet, at the same time, I love this song. Kuszyńska has control of her voice and impeccable diction and combined with the dreamy music--it just works for me.
It reminds me very much of the Azerbaijani entry last year:
Dilara Kazimova "Start a Fire" Azerbaijan 2014
Kasimova got the worst result for one of the most successful countries in Eurovision; however, in my personal Eurovision rotation "Start a Fire" is a regular listen.
I fully expect the same result for the Polish entry this year. Unlike Azerbaijan, Poland doesn't have any natural friendly votes, so it's unlikely to get out of their semifinal. However, I suspect it will be a song I'll champion for years to come.
Like everybody who has a love of the Eurovision Song Contest, I've been sitting down and analyzing the running order for the final.
Here's the running order, as determined by the lovely people at SVT.
1. France
2. Lithuania
3. Moldova
4. Finland
5. Spain
6. Belgium
7. Estonia
8. Belarus
9. Malta
10. Russia
11. Germany
12. Armenia
13. Netherlands
14. Romania
15. UK
16. Sweden
17. Hungary
18. Denmark
19. Iceland
20. Azerbaijan
21. Greece
22. Ukraine
23. Italy
24. Norway
25. Georgia
26. Ireland
Of course, I'm going to be looking at my personal favorite, Anouk for the Netherlands. Unluckily drawn into the first half, she's got a good position--the last song in the first half. She's also between two really lousy songs--the Armenian ecoballad and the (forgive me for offending delicate sensibilities) salute to menstruation--Romania, which will hopefully make the song stand out.
Anouk "Birds" the Netherlands
I hope for a good result for the Dutch entry--maybe a top ten position. I doubt Anouk can win--the song is kind of too classy for the room. If it does, just expect me to be very, very, happy.
As for likely winners, if I were to put down some money, I'd actually go with Ukraine.
Zlata Ognevich "Gravity" Ukraine
It's well placed and if performed the way it was in this clip, it's worthy of winning the Eurovision Song Contest.
And as a long shot, I'd put some money down on this song too:
Really there are only three songs that are likely winners that I don't particularly care for.
Cascada "Glorious" Germany
Emmilie de Forest "Only Teardrops" Denmark
Both of them seem way too generic to actually inspire love, but they are true fan favorites.
Farid Mammadov "Hold Me" Azerbaijan
And on this one, the song is very much back burner to the fantastic gimmick. It's like the sand lady from Ukraine a few years back. That's not a particularly flattering comparison, but it's going to get votes.
But all of this analysis is really pointless. I'm just looking forward to tomorrow morning--the final starts at 11 AM local time here in Alaska. And then comes my favorite part of the Eurovision season. The Eurovision parties to determine Alaska's Choice!
Well, now that Azerbaijan has won and hosted the Eurovision Song Contest, the big question was what would they do next?
And the answer to that was--karaoke night!
After years of well polished, well turned out performances in the contest, I actually decided to sit down and watch the final of Milli Seçim Turu, Azerbaijan's national selection process.
This was absolute torture to sit and listen to. Absolute torture. I cannot believe that the Azerbaijani national broadcaster would put on a show where it seems like everybody was off key and the sound design was done by a rank amateur.
For example take a listen to poor Nigar Huseynova's performance:
Nigar Huseynova "I Still Believe"
She's a soprano. The audio people were so unprepared for her high note it causes feedback. And you can hear the wind machine at the end.
The songs and the music weren't that much better. Take a listen to my vote for worst song in a Eurovision final this year.
Aysel Babayeva "Sleazy Mo"
I'm going to paraphrase a justice of the Supreme Court of the United States here. I may not know how to define atrocious, but I know atrocious when I hear it.
Really none of the songs come out particularly well. Even the winning song sounds particularly terrible in the final.
Farid Mammadov "Hold Me"
I must admit I would have voted for him because he actually sounded great during the chorus of his song, something that nobody else was able to do with the bad sound engineering. (Although I do dock him points for mumbling his way through the first verse.) And I like the ombre shirt.
I have no real opinion on Mammadov, he seems capable enough and the song seems likely enough to make it through to the final. I fully suspect that the Azerbaijani music machine will train him and clean him up enough to allow the song to make a good showing.
Watching the entire thing leaves me with one question. Are Azerbaijani national finals always this bad? San Marino had a better presentation, and they're a country with less than 40,000 people.
I cannot believe that I'm going to say this. I really like the Georgian entry.
Nodi Tatishvili & Sophie Gelovani "Waterfall"
I'll be the first to admit that this is a very calculated choice by the Georgian broadcaster, GPB. They got the composer of the winning entry from last year, Thomas G:son, and looked at the staging of the winner from two years ago and came up with this song.
Usually I would deride this sort of thing, but the choice of Tatishvili & Gelovani have something that Eurovision duets in previous years tend not to have--chemistry.
If you take a look back a prior years' duets, the singers feel like they're singing in different worlds.
Chanée and N'evergreen "In A Moment Like This" Denmark 2010
Ell and Nikki "Running Scared" Azerbaijan 2011
Greta Salóme & Jónsi "Never Forget" Iceland 2012
You may feel differently, but I feel that there was no connection between the singers in the three songs I've posted above, while the Georgian entry has that connection. It looks like the two actually like each other. For me, that goes a long way to sell the song, since my idea of a good duet is set up by this song.
Dolly Parton & Kenny Rogers "Islands in the Stream"
Tatishvili and Gelovani are the singers who come closest to that level of chemistry that Parton and Rogers have. That means I'm flying the flag for the Georgian entry, even though I tend to hate duets in Eurovision.
It has been a couple of weeks since I last updated my journal, and in that time a lot of things have changed--including my residence. That means that I have finally gotten back around to updating my Eurovision blog and I can continue with the next country in my review posts--Azerbaijan.
Baku, Azerbaijan's capital, is a leader in ambitious buildings like the planned Hotel Crescent
Azerbaijan is the newest country in the Eurovision Song Contest, first sending a song in 2008. And in those five years, they have been they have been extremely successful, having placed no lower than eighth in the final contest. It's a track record that most other countries would envy.
Personally, I've never been much of a fan of Azerbaijani entrants. I've always found them to be more of a part of Azerbaijani international policy that actually being representative of their actual musical culture.
A case in point is the song that won the contest back in 2011:
Ell and Nikki "Running Scared" 2011
I've made my opinion known in my introductory post to this series of blog posts, and I still consider it to be pretty horrible--which is only compounded by the fact that really only one person involved with the song was actually living in Azerbaijan at the time--Eldar Gasimov, the male singer in the duet.
But it did exactly what the Azerbaijani government wanted it to do. It won the contest, brought Eurovision to the country, and the government used it to try to propel Azerbaijan onto the world stage and a place where large events could be held.
It still doesn't change the fact that I despise the song and cannot believe it beat out a group of much better songs to win the contest.
But it's not surprising. They tried the same thing a few years previously and came in third with this song:
Aysel and Arash "Always" 2009
This time the only Azerbaijani was the lovely Aysel. Better song too.
Really the only song that doesn't come of completely prepackaged is the first song Azerbaijan sent to Eurovision
.
Elnur and Samir "Day After Day" 2008
I will be the first to admit the staging is absolutely ridiculous; it's pretty self-evident how cheesy it is. However, the song was written by two Azerbaijanis and feels more authentic than anything else they've sent afterwords. So this one gets the vote for best Azerbaijani entry.
3. Safura "Drip Drop" 2010 If a song could try too hard, this would be the song.
4. Aysel and Arash "Always" 2009
5. Ell and Nikki "Running Scared" 2011
Yeah, I must admit I'm pretty savage on Azerbaijan Eurovision entrants. But I have hope that now they have won the contest, proven that they are a country on par with the rest of Europe, they will pull back on the hyper-packaged songs and send music that is more reflective of their own musical culture.
As you know, since you're reading my blog, Azerbaijan won last year's contest and they have the hard task of following up their winning song.
In recent years, countries have had a hard time repeating the success of their previous year's winner. A good case in point is Norway in 2010.
Oslo had the honor of hosting the contest after winning the previous year with this song:
Alexander Rybak "Fairytale" Norway 2009
"Fairytale" was the runaway winner of that year's contest, getting 169 more points that the second place finisher.
The next year, they sent this song:
Didrik Solli-Tangen "My Heart Is Yours" Norway 2010
It's a completely different song, and it came in twentieth in the final that year.
With that in mind, take a listen to this year's Azerbaijani entry:
Sabina Babayeva "When The Music Dies"
I have a suspicion that his is going to fall to the same fate that Solli-Tangen did a few years ago, and get nowhere near the top ohalf of the board at the end of the contest.
But unlike Solli-Tangen, whose issues was really a voice that was burned out, Ms. Babayeva has an even bigger issue--an inability to actually interpret the song.
"When the Music Dies" is a ballad, and you must be able to not only sing the song tunefully, but be able to interpret them in a way that shows you understand the feeling behind the song, and Ms. Babayeva can only do the first. Since English isn't her first language, Ms. Babayeva comes off sounding like an automaton, not a real live human being.
It's very difficult to be able to find the emotion when singing in another language--I would have the same difficulty singing in German--a language I have a tenuous grasp on. Unfortunately, she's trying to appeal to a pan-European audience and I don't think this was the song for her to do that.
For the past few years, usually on the weekend of the Eurovision Song Contest, I throw a party, invite some friends around, cook a mess of food, and otherwise have a great time watching Europe present the "best" songs that they can come up with.
It's a blast, but there's one thing that we don't understand in the Last Frontier. Why do you choose the songs that you do?
Case in point:
In the last Eurovision Song Contest, the Azerbaijani entry won the kit and caboodle.
Ell and Nikki "Running Scared"
In our voting, this song came in dead last. She was flat, and the two of them had absolutely no chemistry on stage whatsoever. The collective groan from the group in Anchorage when it won over the rest of the songs was audible.
Our choice was one that barely made it to the middle of the table, the Serbian entrant
Nina "Caroban"
Nina, was cute, the staging was peppy, she stayed on key, it was in a language other than English, and the song is damn infectious. In other words, everything that Ell and Nikki's song wasn't.
It's really rather frustrating.
So some of my friends and I have decided to go back through all the years of Eurovision and crown our own winner--Alaska's Choice. Watch this blog in the next week or two for the first entrant, our choice for the winner of the very first Eurovision Song Contest, all the way back in 1956.
